If you see this person, contact your local authorities immediately!

She damn near killed me.

Book Review and Giveaway!

I was recently contacted by award-winning author Nava Atlas to review her newest book, Secret Recipes for the Modern Wife.    

Though Nava has written several popular vegetarian cookbooks, Secret Recipes for the Modern Wife is far from your ordinary cookbook... it's a a tongue-in-cheek take on marriage in the modern age! 

 

"Flavored with frustration, simmering with rage, and iced with affection, these recipes will make you laugh as you multitask your way through the challenges and joys of matrimony."

As I read through the "recipes", I did laugh out loud at most of them... and found myself nodding my head and thinking, "yep, that's exactly my life!" while reading others, such as Gender Role Casserole, Souffle of Fallen Expectations, and Way Too Much on Your Plate.  

I think any wife... from newlyweds to those who have been married a long time... would enjoy this humorous and witty book!  Which is why one lucky reader will win their very own copy of Secret Recipes for the Modern Wife! 

Just comment on this post and you're entered!

Want additional entries?

• Follow my blog (or let me know you already do) - 1 entry
• Follow me on Twitter (or let me know you already do) - 1 entry
• Tweet about this giveaway (be sure to comment with your Twitter status or include @NutHouseShannon in your tweet so I know you tweeted!) - 1 entry

Deadline to have your entries in by is 11:59 p.m. (EST), Tuesday, June 2nd.  Winner will be randomly selected and announced Wednesday, June 3rd.  Be sure to leave one comment for each entry... and be sure to leave your email address in your comment if it's not available under your Blogger profile!

Good luck!

It's a sickness, really...

Hi, my name is Shannon.

And I'm a flip-flopoholic.

There are 14 pair in the above picture.

Then I noticed another pair by the back door...

And one more by the front door...

I think I need a 12-step program.

I swear, they're out to get me...

School is over (at least until August 12th).

So, why... why... 

WHY have my kids been up every morning at 6:00 since Saturday?!

And not just awake... but bright-eyed, ready-to-face-the-day awake.

And... for some reason, they think it's acceptable to barge in my room, demanding I get their breakfast, when they are perfectly capable of getting their own Pop Tarts off the bottom shelf of the pantry.   

Just once, I want to sleep in.  Is that really too much to ask?

It's gonna be a looooooong summer break...

Table Topics Tuesdays

I guess it's that time of year... I've seen more and more of these signs lately:  

what would you love to find 

at a yard sale?

So... you wanna go out again?

Ask my girls what I did last night, and they'd tell you I had a "date with Angie".

Which is true, I guess... seeing as how I paid for dinner.  

Anyhoo... after we stuffed ourselves ate, we went to Books-A-Million and wandered around for awhile.  I did buy a few books... including one from Angie's favorite author and this one that looks right up my alley.   

At the check-out, I was looking at a box of those Twilight heart candies, when the pierced-lip-teen-aged-cashier-girl asked if we were "fans of Twilight".   We confirmed we were, but not crazy-stalker-fans.  The girl then told us earlier there had been an "old woman who bought, like, $150 worth of Twilight stuff."  

Angie told the girl, "You better step-off, missy... who you callin' old?"... or something like that.

And the cashier was all, "Oh, no... not like you!  She was like, 50... what are you two, like, 29?"

I think Angie told the girl she was her new best friend... but I couldn't really make out what Angie was saying, since she was weeping tears of joy.

As for me, I was thisclose to kissing that cashier full on the mouth.  Lip piercing and all...

After leaving the bookstore on a euphoric high, we headed to Sonic for some crazy late night snackin'.

Seriously, I can't think of a better night...

The end is near!

Just three more days of school...


Just three more days of school...


Just three more days of school...

Speaking of something that's "old"...

Happy 37th Birthday, Shane!

(Sorry about the "old" remark... you know I love you, babe.  Enjoy your golf game!)

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For today's Table Topics Tuesday question...

what is the worst gift you've ever received?

I walked right into this one...

Don't you just love lazy Sunday afternoons?

The fam was hanging out in the living room yesterday.... Shane was reading the paper, the girls were playing a game and I was flipping through TV channels. I came across the movie Beetle Juice... watched a little bit but then I flipped channels again and found Back to the Future.

Me: "Oh! Back to the Future! You know what would be just perfect?! If the next movie to come on was The Goonies!"

Hannah: "What's Back to the Future and The Goonies?"

Me: {uh, just two of the most awesomest movies ever}... "They're movies from the 80s... movies Mommy watched when she was a kid."

Hannah: "Oh, you mean old movies."

Michaela: "Yeah... REEEAAL old. Who wants to watch those?"

Little bit of this, little bit of that...

Angie is having a fabulous jewelry giveaway here!  The prize is your choice of pendant from Analiese Designs, a very cool Etsy shop.  I think this one would be my choice... it's called "Japanese Garden" and it's one of my favorites:

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All hail the queen!  Brandy gave me this award!

Kathie and Jennifer bestowed this award upon me:

Thank you, ladies!  

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I read about this website, over on Rebecca's blog.  

Upload a photo, and the website will manipulate it to look like a photograph of a model:  

Pretty cool, huh?

Caption This Photo!

(then go check out Candid Carrie for more fun, fabulous fotos!)

It's been awhile since I've had to share my bed...

...with a toddler.  Especially one that tosses, turns, twitches, talks and twists in her sleep!  Needless to say, I didn't get much sleep last night.

Good thing she's cute, huh?

My 3-year-old niece, Ladybug, spent last night with us.  She'll be staying tonight, too, while my brother and sister-in-law are out of town.  

If I thought she'd lay down with me, we'd be back in the bed for a nice nap.  But Ladybug is having way too much fun tormenting playing with the dog.  And making a mess playing with the girls' toys.  

I'm going to let her play for a bit longer... then little Ladybug and I are going to run some errands!

Table Topics Tuesdays

The Atlantis Space Shuttle launched yesterday... which leads me to today's "Table Topics" question...

if you were offered a seat on the next space shuttle,

would you take it?

Baby Got Back (and a whole lot more...)

Like many women who eat a lot of chocolate/ice cream/cookies/ {insert any junk food here}... but don't do a lot of exercise... I've put on more than I care to admit a few pounds lately. 

With summer just around the corner... it's high time I get off my ever-expanding rear and put it in gear.  Not only for my health, but I've started to not like what I see in the mirror.

I've said it before (and I'm sure I'll say it again), no way would I be able to do the Atkins diet.  I enjoy carbs too much to even fathom eating a hamburger without the bun... or a plate of spaghetti without the noodles.  Seriously, that's just crazy talk right there!  

I have tried Weight Watchers before (well, not officially... my sister did and she let me use her books).  With WW's point system, I'm allotted 26 daily points.  One trip to Steak 'n Shake and I can't eat for three days!

What I need to do is not diet... but start making healthier choices when it comes to food.  Utilize portion control.  Eat more fresh fruits and veggies... less cookies and ice cream.  Of course, that doesn't mean I'm going to deprive myself!  If I want a bowl of ice cream, I'm going to have it... just in moderation.  

And I need to get some daily exercise.  We have a Wii Fit... sadly, I couldn't tell you the last time I've used it.  I should also get outside to enjoy the sunshine (when this rain stops, that is) by joining Shane more often when he goes for a walk.  

  

Then maybe I'll like what I see in the mirror again...

Moms

What ingredients are mothers made of?

Hannah: Love.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

Michaela: I don't know... I wasn't alive back then.

What is the difference between moms and dads?

Hannah: Their voices... moms are louder, 'cause they yell more.

Michaela: Moms are girls and dads are boys, duh.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

Hannah: All the time is your spare time.

Michaela: Sleep and blog on your computer.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

Hannah: Magic. 

Michaela: For you to buy me all the toys I want.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

Hannah: Nothing... I love you.

Michaela: Let me play on the computer more.  

Have a Happy Mother's Day!

Another case of art imitating life...

Remember when I said I should rethink my "mommy uniform"?

I'm telling you, I really do think Rick and Jerry have placed hidden cameras in my house... and are using me as their inspiration...

 I apologize for my lack of commneting lately... my internet connection keeps going in and out.  Mostly out.  And I've been working on getting swap partners matched up.  I still haven't gotten back to all my lovely SITStas who visited me last week... but I promise I will get back to each and every one!  And make my usual rounds, as well...

day spent with friends + wine tasting = GOOD TIMES (minus the part where I was almost attacked by a bird)

So who's wondering where (and with whom) I went on my road trip?

Anyone?... anyone?  Bueller?  

Angie and I drove to Asheville for a day of fun at Biltmore.  And Lizzy met us when we got there!  Yay!  

We had a yummy lunch before touring the house (Angie is a Biltmore-virgin no longer... woo hoo!)   After the house, we headed to the winery and farm on the estate... it was at the farm I almost lost my life to a crazy bird.  I don't know why my being in peril was soooo funny to Angie and Lizzy.  But they had a good laugh over my misfortune.  

Lizzy headed home after our time at the farm, so it was just Angie and I who toured the winery.  We tasted some very nice wines... and some that were not so very nice.  After making a few purchases in the winery gift shop (and a "few purchases" means one bottle of wine for Angie... three bottles for me), we headed home. 

Spending the day with good friends... add a little wine and a lot of laughter...

Life doesn't get much better than that.

Who let one rip?

Blog Farts – noun. Def: Crappy ideas that are too short to make a real blog post, but when combined, join forces to make one unified, albeit half assed, post. see also: memes, surveys.

Source: Jaci, Ravings of a Mad Housewife

• My "adventures in dog-sitting" are over... Heather picked up her dogs yesterday afternoon.  My girls now think we need to get another dog... so Izzie will have someone to play with and not be lonely.  Uh-huh... let's just see how well that goes over with their Daddy!  

• I really need to color my hair.  It was a lot easier to do myself when my hair was shorter {sigh}.  

• Road trip tomorrow!  I'll be blogging about it, so I'm not gonna say where I'm going... or with whom... or who else might meet up with us.  You'll just have to wait and see...

• There's still time to sign up for my swap!  Click here if you're interested! 

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I'm also participating in Scary Mommy's Flashback Friday!

This is a way to showcase those posts you wrote when you first started blogging... waaaay back when there were only two people who read your blog (and one of those was your mom).  So take a trip down memory lane and... nope, you have to click the button to go see what post I linked!  

Have a great weekend, y'all!